US-style freedom was finally returned to Iraq yesterday as its people indiscriminately looted local businesses and hospitals.

One delighted marine said, "This is what we've been working towards. It's only on a small scale right now, but soon they'll be looting pension funds just like the grown-up democrats over at Enron. And our government will help them, just they did in the US."

Looking at a hospital being emptied of incubators and heart machines he laughed. "Can you believe this was once owned by the state?" he asked. "But it's in private hands, now. It's survival of the fittest."