Following MPs' landmark failure to decide how to reform the House of Lords, their Lordships today decided to get rid of the Commons entirely, claiming it ran against the principles of democracy. Lord Smugness of Little Smirking said, "It's clear that the role of the Commons is only to delay legislation. It serves no useful purpose and needs radical change."

MPs had earlier failed to vote for any one of the Lords reforms. They had the option of a wholly-elected second chamber, a wholly-unelected second chamber, or a partly-elected second chamber with a side order of unelected chamber and any dessert worth £5.00 or less. However they couldn't decide and went for a drink in the bar instead.

Nevertheless the Commons' Leader, Robin Cook, maintained the MPs had clearly shown they were in touch with the electorate. "The general public are utterly bored with elections," he said, "and we have clearly reflected this by being so boldly indecisive and ineffectual. No other political body shows such character."