Yasser Arafat yesterday levied the full force of his power in a television address to say that terrorism was really a bit off, and would people please stop doing it, if it wasn't too much trouble.

Mr Arafat said he still liked to think his opinion mattered in these kind of scenarios, and that if the people who were killing innocent Israelis continued then he'd really be quite upset. Many people supported him, he went on, including members of the Palestinian Authority, he felt sure of it.

A representative for Hamas, who we silhouetted to preserve her anonymity, said "Mr Arafat is really fearsome. We're shaking, absolutely shaking with laughter." A random Palestinian stopped in the street said, "Yasser who?"