The Prime Minister, Tony Blair, yesterday wracked his brains to recall what parliament was, and what it was used for.

"I realise now it's a just part of our arcane tradition, with no real importance whatsoever," he told press and TV crews in Downing Street. "At first I thought it was where matters of policy are announced, but of course that's what press releases are for. And then I wondered if it was a forum for discussing such issues as the Middle East, but of course I don't need to do that, least of all with MPs."